A child’s Christmas gift for her father’s explosive anger…
“Rages threaten the security or safety of another individual and violate their personal boundaries.” — Out of the Fog
My child was looking through the Christmas catalogs, commenting on the toys when the page turned to the sporting section.
A brown plastic deer decoy used by hunters stared back with glossy black eyes.
I will never forget what my child said to me, “We should get that for Daddy’s rages. He can take his anger out on that.”
My two children have voluntarily come forward at different times, and apart from each other, to tell me about “Daddy’s rages” and other episodes of violent and frightening behavior.
Martin Hegland won full custody of both children despite being diagnosed by the court ordered psych eval as being a “master manipulator” and having a “personality disorder”. Personality disorder would explain the “rages”.
I have personally witnessed the “rages” and how the children were targeted…my son gets the brunt of the physical abuse because he has special needs, and often fights back. My daughter is more like me, going silent, trying to fix things, disappearing. She fights back by withdrawing, going silent.
Martin has a long history of anti-social behavior, stemming from his teenage years where he committed crimes (including burglary) and began abusing alcohol. Martin also has a long, documented history of physical, mental and emotional abuse against the children and I. Both of my children have experienced PTSD, anxiety, trouble sleeping and suffer from various psychological symptoms that continue to this day. There are over a dozen documented, reported allegations of child abuse against Martin including hitting, choking, tackling, breaking toys and swearing at both children. Martin is also responsible for the death of our family pet. My daughter has never fully recovered from the loss of our pet and even as a teen carries around a stuffed animal named after him.
I was told by Guardian ad Litem Jamie Manning not to talk about my concerns for the safety and well-being of my children because “I am just making Martin look bad”. Ms. Manning said that any abuse that Martin inflicted on me “happened in the past” and there is no logical reason that I should be afraid of him now. Mrs. Manning said my concerns of past abuse and the current safety of the children are more dangerous to the children than the actual abuse itself, and so the children should be removed from my care and custody given to the man who inflicted egregious harm and trauma.
I have not given up the fight to keep my children safe and bring them home. The injustice in the Hennepin County Family Court will not deter me. My children deserve to be safe, happy and loved.
~ Emily Court, December 2014
For More Info on Personality Disorders and Rage Attacks…
Out of the Fog –“Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression”. Explanation on rage vs. anger. Survival tips. Info and support for family member or loved one who suffers from personality disorder.: http://outofthefog.net/CommonBehaviors/Raging.html
“Blame-Storms and Rage Attacks Common to Borderlines, Narcissists” by Randi Kreger, “Stop Walking on Eggshells”. How anger and rage is manifested by Borderlines and Narcissists. Understanding the differences between BPD rage attacks and Narcisstic injury: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stop-walking-eggshells/201111/blame-storms-and-rage-attacks-common-borderlines-narcissists
“Borderline Personality-The Quiet Acting in Borderline and The Silent Treatment-Nons” by AJ Mahari, Life Coach and BPD Coach. Explanation of the pathology behind BPD rages and silent treatment.Mahari also explains why this behavior is abusive and harmful to targeted victims.: http://borderlinepersonality.typepad.com/my_weblog/2008/07/borderline-pe-2.html