May 25, 2017 – Listen in to The Captain with guest, Lynn Marie, who shares her story of surviving domestic abuse, and the devastating impact when a family court in Hennepin County unjustly awarded sole custody of the children to the identified abuser.
Click on this link to hear the show (an archive will also be available): The Captain Radio Show with Guest Lynn Marie
Personal Note Going Public with My Story: When I began this journey of telling my story, the scars of the years of abuse I endured were still very raw. I was ashamed and struggled with understanding what abuse is, and that I was not at fault for what happened to me. I also live in fear of my abuser because he was actively harassing and stalking me.
Encountering a family court system that was totally insensitive to the abuse my children and I experienced, and hostile when I raised concerns for safety only served to instill more fear, and trauma. For years, I was constantly told by the Guardian ad Litem and the judges on my case not to talk about abuse. I was told it was wrong to be fearful of my abuser. False allegations were raised against me like arrows.
What kept me going through all of these challenges is my love for my children. What I wanted to show them more than anything is that the cycle of abuse can be broken. I vowed to end the abuse in their generation. And I never gave up hope that they would someday come home.
Reading the stories of other abuse and family court, CPS survivors gave me tremendous courage and inspiration. I found an online support group for parents involved in family court litigation. Talked with both moms and dad from across the country, and the world, facing similar battles; and I knew I wasn’t alone. Nor was my story unique. The support and love of my family, friends, and church showed me a light shining at the end of a very dark tunnel. And slowly this broken, frightened girl began to heal and become stronger.
When I began the “Family Court Injustice” blog I decided to use a pen name “Emily Court”(a pun on the word family court!) because I still was afraid of my abusive ex and the courts. And for so long the fear controlled me. Then I realized that hiding and keep silent was only enabling the abuser, and the courts would never be held accountable if not exposed. I realized I may face retaliation if I spoke out publicly. I understood that I may come under attack or ridicule because I would then be a whistle blower. I understood that other abusers, trolls or flying monkeys may target me if I spoke out, using my real name because that can happen when your story goes public, and people disagree with you or have an agenda of their own. Those who attack survivors after they go public with their story are complicit in the very abuse and injustice done to us. And they alone bear the shame of their misdeeds. I accepted the risk because I realize now that the abuse is not my fault. I have done nothing wrong. And no person ever should be hurt by someone they love, and made to live in fear. The truth will speak for itself.
Every survivor’s voice should be respected. A survivor’s choice to go public with their name or story, or not or some variation of should be respected. It is courageous to speak out, and not an easy task.
I will no longer live in fear or allow anyone to break me again. And I will continue to support survivors in the ways I can, and raise awareness of family court and CPS failures in order to make needed change.
I am so thankful to the Captain for this opportunity to share my story and use my real name – Lynn Marie. I am thankful for the opportunity to break the silence imposed on me so I can expose the systemic failures and corruption existing in family court that have caused my children – and many others – to be forcefully taken from a fit, loving parent and forced them to live in abuse and dysfunction.
Please visit the Captain on blogtalk to listen to more episodes on The Constitution, American Values and the meaning of Freedom. Episodes also include stories of families involved with CPS and family court: The Captain Online Radio